Both of my sisters are pregnant.
It is very exciting.
What is even more exciting is the fact that I am going to be the godfather of both of the little cherubs.
I am already an uncle to perhaps the coolest little three-year-old boy in the world, and I can’t wait to meet two more awesome babies in the next two months.
My older sister, already a mother, should probably be the one giving my other sister and brother-in-law parenting advice. But I will do my part by referring them to this helpful chart of Baby Do’s and Don’ts:
These images are part of a book by David & Kelly Sopp. Buy it here.
To my sisters: You are welcome for this sound advice.
To my new nephew and niece: I can’t wait to meet you. And when you get older, never read this blog.
-Youngman Brown
Awww. And you'll be a godfather. Congratulations!
All I can say is this is a great post. I love reading you, Mr Brown. Keep writing!
Man, they were all so predictable, but I still about wet myself. Funny stuff!
WG
http://itsmynd.com
Thanks, I'm excited to be a godfather x2.
And thanks for the kind words.
Thanks! It's been a while since I've had an infant so these are great reminders! [walks to nursery to uninstall tv from side of crib]
Babies are pretty predictable.
And they wet themselves too.
No problem, sis. Love you!
You're quickly becoming one of my favorite stops! Very funny!! I'm a huge fan of sarcastic humor 🙂
Congratulations to both your sisters and you to become a godfather!
Do you watch family guy? Ever see the episode wher Lois is weaning Stewie off of breast feeding. Out of desperation he tries to feed off of Peter. Omg, cracking uppp!!! That picture so reminded me of that. lol
Ahahahaha. That was absolutely the best parenting advice I've ever seen.
A little Jack D. on the gums while teething never hurt me or my parents apparently. Just something to keep in mind.
Congratulations to you and your sisters!!! I must admit that one time on vacation when my son was an infant, there were no cribs available in the hotel, and we had to use a drawer for him to sleep in because we thought he would fall out of the bed or would smother with pillows all around him. He's a healthy 16 year old now. Ya gotta do what ya gotta do sometimes.
Congratulations!
I wish I would have had this chart when the girl was small. It explains so much.
I have to disagree on the “Nursing” image. I saw on Family Guy that it's perfectly acceptable for a man to help!
Ha!! Nice one. Congratulations! Being an aunt, or uncle in your case, is the best. Enjoy it!
Well thanks! You are becoming one of my favorite stops as well.
And yes, I have seen that episode. Stewie is one of the best characters to ever exist, in my opionion.
A little Jack D never hurt anyone, as far as I'm concerned.
It really is helpful.
Hahaha refer to Jax's post.
I know! I am pumped to be Uncle x3
Hey, whatever ya gotta do. No judging here 🙂
I think I was guilty of a couple of those. Congratulations on the new family.
Congrats, man. I hope they're both kick-ass little kids. And the only thing missing from the list (which was fucking hilarious, btw) was a 'How to properly shake your baby' tutorial.
Dammit, you're right. It's important to not shake too hard, but hard enough that the baby gets the message.
Thank you sir!
with one on the way this is some great advice…but surely its good to start them off on chess early – it works in Russia
Thanks for the advice, Uncle Mike:) very funny:) any day now:)
I wish I had this guide to raising babies properly years ago. That would explain the unusual behavior my kids demonstrate!
Oh, I think I am a bad parent…
This was hugely funny, Uncle Mike:)
All of those things become ALMOST OK when it's your second child.
I've not got kids myself, but this all seems pretty sound advice to me.
Love you.
First, I will have to get good at chess. I always get crushed very quickly at that game.
From what I know about you, I am sure they turned out fine, my friend.
Oh boy it seems as if my sister blew up my true identify to the blogging world.
This made me chuckle, Brea
I'm sure there are a few other tips, but it is a solid foundation.
Congratulations! Babies are awesome.
Sadly this excellent advice comes 10 years too late for me, but I will be forwarding it on to my favorite pro-creators from now on. You sir, have performed a great public service here.
Yeah, what she said. I really was laughing so hard that she needed to read it for herself. Great find, and congratulations to your expanding family.
your right, my sides are hurtin!!! were still laughin!!laughin so hard were crying…thanks for that Chris….BTW, congrats to both your sisters and too you..
Krista
Being someone who isn't particularly fond of babies I find this hilarious. I'm pretty sure the 'calming baby' one is perfect acceptable. 'Containing baby' had me laughing out loud.
Both uncle and godfather! That's a heavy burden. I guess you don't know any friendly mafia dons.
I agree. Especially ones related to you.
And you are doing a great service by spreading it further.
Thank you, sir!
Yes, my favorite is “Waking Baby.”
But babies are cool!
Actually…
Holy crap it's a good thing I don't have kids because I totally want to try all of the don'ts. This is probably why no one ever asks me to babysit. It's also most likely the reason that all of my neices and nephews affectionately call me Aunt Crazy. Congrats on being Uncle and Godfather!
Is it wrong that I found this post HILARIOUS?! I'm not one for babies and I could so see myself as the 'wrong/bad/no/don't/incorrect/unsafe' etc.! I just make them cry! Don't get me wrong, I like children, but I couldn't eat a whole one! 🙂
Lol this post scares me.
Meh, babysitting is overrated.
Thanks!
Ahem… good solid parenting advice is what it is all about. Thanks for sharing.
Certainly not real advice. People can read your book for that!
Yep that about sums it up all right. I actually considered the washing one not to long ago myself as my grandbaby is sooo heavy now.