Gettin’ Digits On Mother’s Day: The Conclusion

To illustrate how badly this guy failed, here is just one example of the things they talked about.  This particular example came in the beginning of the Phillies game, while he was still at his lowest point of drunkenness.

She mentioned that she was reading the series A Song of Ice and Fire, upon which the (amazing) show Game of Thrones is based.

She expressed how much she loved the books.

He said, “Isn’t that the shit with elves and shit?”

She then gave him a basic education of the series, doing so in such an accommodating and easy-to-understand language that made it easy for any second grader or drunken 28-year old to comprehend.  And she described it in such an adoring and tender tone that made it clear that it was something near and dear to her heart.

I, myself, happen to love the show, and when she had finished her eloquent description of the books, I wanted to immediately pull out my iPhone, purchase it on iTunes, and begin reading it, right there in my expensive seats at the Phillies game.

“You really should check out the books,” she said to her date.  “They are great.”

“Nah,” he replied.  “I’m not into that shit.”

Read more

Gettin’ Digits On Mother’s Day

My mom is a hardcore Phillies fan.  One of her most prized possessions is a gift that I got her a few years ago — a walkman.  If the Phillies are playing, you can bet your ass that she has those headphones on and is listening to the game.  Anytime we talk on the phone or I go to visit, she is always complaining or rejoicing about the team, whatever the case may be.  Recently, it has been mostly complaining.  But even when they are losing, she is a die-hard fan.
For such a big fan of the team, however, she rarely goes to any games.  Maybe once a season.  And when my parents do go to games, they typically sit very high-up.

So this year, my sister and I decided to splurge for Mother’s Day and get her super-close-to-the-action seats.  Being the second-biggest Phillies fan in the family, I would accompany her, a task that I was pleased to fulfill.

And that is how I found myself a few rows behind the Phillies dugout, next to my mother, when a beautiful girl sat next to me.

Alone.

Read more