[I]

Among other things,

Condom sales reach their peak

Around Valentine’s Day.

…so have fun with that. 🙁

[II]

Have fun?  Great!  Because

March is the highest grossing month

For at-home pregnancy tests.

So have fun with that 🙂

[III]

Oh, and on Valentine’s Day, 1929,

Penicillin was introduced

To cure you of your syphilis.

Try to have fun with that! <3

-Youngman Brown